A Week after My Motherʼs Death
1.
I was holding her hand (but did she know). I could no longer ask her permission
to adjust her pillows. (The fish had electrified themselves,
they could feel each other, they could feel me enter the surf.)
I remember gasping
to adjust her pillows. (The fish had electrified themselves,
they could feel each other, they could feel me enter the surf.)
I remember gasping
I remember a long pull of breath—
long draw followed by two short ones,
then a quietening,
then a surprised sound—
long draw followed by two short ones,
then a quietening,
then a surprised sound—
2.
it was the river in winter the river
in winter
the hills
with snow the
long dune the
silk tassel
in winter
the hills
with snow the
long dune the
silk tassel
the winter
we took for granted
all these things rolled
around in my memory
how her jade ring
turns on my finger
we took for granted
all these things rolled
around in my memory
how her jade ring
turns on my finger
the moon the comets the tide
bloated
up the shore
bloated
up the shore
the moon the tide the comets
unnoticed
barely mentioned
the moon I tried to stay awake for
3.
