I like the original voice, the judgmental narrator, and the sarcastic dialogue. I had begun to think that only tortured internal ferment or inscrutable prose experiments were interesting to journal editors. This was fun, and perhaps a cautionary tale, as my primary source of income atrophies in the face of a bad writing habit.
James Crissman replied on Tue, 04/20/2010 - 08:05am
Congratulations on this one, Richard. You must have had an absolute blast writing it. I can almost hear you chuckling as you read it back to yourself. The narrator won me over right away, and I felt cool for being almost smart enough to keep up with the world of corporate finance, and also for understanding all the beer in the Jasper's world.
Aostre Suzanne Kehm replied on Tue, 04/20/2010 - 02:28pm
Hey, James. In the new economy, nobody has income anyway. At least you've got a bad habit to fall back on! And with a bad habit like writing, who needs good ones? Thanks for reading, it's nice to know someone's out there.
Richard Smith replied on Wed, 04/21/2010 - 10:15am
Best one yet. The flippant tone of the narrator almost makes him or her the main character, at least in my mind. Incidentally, Oatman reminded me of many people I knew in Las Vegas.
Eugenia Parrish replied on Sun, 05/16/2010 - 04:17pm
I might be a decade or so late to the party, but I'm now on the Richard Smith bandwagon, too. Have read most everything of his on the site just tonight. Why can't there be more?? :)
Ironic and sensible. The story's setting could have been Laughlin, Nevada and the neighboring ghost town of Oatman. Was that intentional?
Thanks for reading and commenting, Julie Bare.
Oatman's just a great-sounding name, to my ear. No offense to the town, or its burro population, intended.
I liked "Loser," especially all the lines with the narrator passing judgment on Jasper.
I like the original voice, the judgmental narrator, and the sarcastic dialogue. I had begun to think that only tortured internal ferment or inscrutable prose experiments were interesting to journal editors. This was fun, and perhaps a cautionary tale, as my primary source of income atrophies in the face of a bad writing habit.
Congratulations on this one, Richard. You must have had an absolute blast writing it. I can almost hear you chuckling as you read it back to yourself. The narrator won me over right away, and I felt cool for being almost smart enough to keep up with the world of corporate finance, and also for understanding all the beer in the Jasper's world.
Hey, James. In the new economy, nobody has income anyway. At least you've got a bad habit to fall back on! And with a bad habit like writing, who needs good ones? Thanks for reading, it's nice to know someone's out there.
Thanks for reading, Suzanne. It's good to know there are like minds out there.
Best one yet. The flippant tone of the narrator almost makes him or her the main character, at least in my mind. Incidentally, Oatman reminded me of many people I knew in Las Vegas.
I might be a decade or so late to the party, but I'm now on the Richard Smith bandwagon, too. Have read most everything of his on the site just tonight. Why can't there be more?? :)